October 6, 2018

Hating My Life Is Over With Baby!

After hearing so many talk to me today, & these kids of mine having me doing stuff today…. I snapped out of it! Maybe not completely because there’s still a knot in my stomach, but not like there was. I actually had a few different moments today where my heart didn’t ache at all, & I wasn’t worrying about something…. I relaxed! It felt good!

I think I may have ran a few followers off & I apologize. But when I’m down I’m way down, there’s no in between & no filter on my mouth.

I thought about everything all day long really hard. I mean really hard. I shed a few tears twice today, that’s it.

No problem is so big it can overwhelm me, hellooo….I’m Lori!

No job will bring me down.

No person can bring me down. Although I’m sure a certain person enjoyed the hell outta me falling apart for a few days. You’re beneath me, you cannot compare on any level with me. I don’t lie & treat people like shit on purpose just for my enjoyment. I’m a woman, not a child.

I have a good heart & treat others well. I go out of my way to make someone else feel better even when I shouldn’t, I can’t help it.

As far as for some men. I’m too damn good! I’m too damn good! Did you hear me? I’m too damn good for you!

I don’t lie about who I am. I don’t cheat. I’m not a thief. I don’t put on a show then change when you get to know me. I’m authentic. I’m original. I’m wild spirited. I’m honest as a mother fucker. I’ll make you feel things you never have before (in ANYthing). I’m wifey material, not some whiney ass little girl who can’t do much of what a woman can do. I’m the shit. I’m as real as it’ll get. I cook meals like granny can, not microwaved bullshit. I ain’t afraid to do anything a man can do. I love fishing & hunting. I love ATVs, motorcycles, & omg pickup trucks!! I’m a tomboy, not a girly girl. I have many many talents simply because I want to know how to do everything lol!! I can make love to a man that I have chemistry with, & have him begging for more. I’m adventurous. I’m very sexual & I take it very seriously, I’m also very kinky. I work very hard at whatever job I’m doing. I can dress up being fine as hell, then spit dip juice like a man with my son off the front porch lol. There ain’t much I won’t or cannot do, try me.

I’ve said it before & I’ll say it again. If you take the time to get to know the real me, you will not want me out of your life. There’s a few people that stay in my life because they just know.

All that…..completely sober. I’m as clean as a whistle to top it off. I don’t walk around twitching & can’t think straight needing my next high. I don’t need to be high to do any of it or anything.

Me bragging much?..Nah, just flat out facts! I know who the fuck I am! Do you?

Never again will I ever allow anyone to make me feel less than them. I’m a hell of a person. I don’t present myself boldly like I’m better than others, I help others out of their funk to become their best like I do. To be able to be as confident in their selves like I am.

But once you screw me over real bad, I’m done with you for life. If they’ll do it once, most likely they’ll do it again.

Yeah, I’m back….

I still long for the right man to walk into my life. But I’ll never settle for anything but being number one. No other women, no loving a job more than me, etc.

I’m first, I’m the shit. I deserve the very best because I give everything I have & then some. I deserve to be at the top of the list, not a doormat.

Some have walked away. But hey that’s your choice, you’re missing out on the best thing that could’ve ever happened to you. Not my loss.

I choose me.

Everything came down & happened all at once on me. It smothered me & hurt me like hell, but……… I woke up today. 3 full days in of beating myself up & then I realized I’m damn worth it all. I’m tough, I’ll get through this dark spell soon.

Guess what? Lemme tell ya what happens when Lori stands up for herself & realizes she’s the shit…… I now have two jobs. My rent is paid. The parts my truck needed are being put on it, & looking for a second ride to purchase. Other smaller bills will be getting paid as well & I have enough money to get other things done as well with plenty to save. I don’t need a man for his money, I find my own way because I’m a real woman. Because I’m strong. If I’m after a man, it’s not his money I want, it’s him.

I’m going to get my hair done in a few days, getting my blonde back! Oh & I’m going back to the gym & tanning bed as well. I’m fixing to hit a dentist up too That’s me right there, taking care of myself because I’ve yet to find a man that can do it better than me.

How lucky a man is gonna be to get with me is undeniably nothing but the honest truth. I am who I say I am wholeheartedly baby.

Focus is back to making myself & my life better!

Love you dearly, Lori

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