October 5, 2018

I Hate My Life

Update: I don’t hate my life. When you go through so many bad things in life, it gets to you at times. I snapped out of it, read ‘I no longer hate my life’. This was me writing through pain & fear. I have no one to turn to, so I write.

My whole life has been a joke.

I’ve endured pains & went through situations that would make the devil leave the room. And the worst ones, nobody knows about.

I’m tired of crying, my eyes are swollen. My heart is aching now more than it ever has. I can’t take it anymore, I’m done.

Oh God its like I’m being stabbed to death, I can’t take this pain.

My make up is gone, my hair is fucked up, my face seems swollen. I don’t see a reason to shower, it won’t matter if I’m gone anyways.

I don’t have the strength to pick myself up this time. Its too late, I can’t do it. I need help.

I’m really hating the world & everything in it right now. I hate myself for allowing myself to tolerate & let people use me! Use me to the max!!!!!!!!!!!

Allowing people to use me is on the verge of me being evicted & losing everything!!!!!!

I hate these evil cold hearted mother fuckers. Their lives will never get better because karma will always be at their door.

I need someone to help me, I’m dying.

You can best believe that I believe in that karma junk, & you will be handed yours I promise, IN FULL! I may not get to see it, but I know you’ll receive it.

I feel so disgusting!

I feel so used!

To hell with being good hearted! Only gets me fucked over every damn time!

I have no one there for me. There’s no one coming to hold me through my pain. I’m not going to survive.

No one is ever fucking there for me like I’ve been for them!

I can’t breathe. I can’t feel my body, I’m numb.

I barely can see the screen to type this post, its hard to do through these tears.

Please someone save me from myself.

I can’t get out of the bed again.

This time I’m done, I’m done with everyone. I don’t care anymore. My heart can’t take anymore pain!

My head hurts, my stomach hurts, I can’t eat sleep or think.

No one is coming to save me. No one cares or loves me.

No one will even notice when I die. No one.

I’m in a place in my life where everything is crumbling down & all of it is unfair to me. ALL OF IT. I’ve done nothing wrong at all but care & love with everything I had for evil people.

My heart was once again used & trampled on by others, I won’t recover this time………at all.

I won’t be around for anyone to destroy me again. I’m gone.

Please feel free to comment

%d bloggers like this: