September 18, 2018

Unexplainable Calmness

Good evening or almost good night lol.

Have you ever noticed that in different time frames in your life, you find your thinking a little more mature? It’s kinda weird to me. It’s like one day you wake up and you just simply don’t think the way you did yesterday. Growing up stages, I suppose we never stop.

But seriously though, I have a calmness about me I’ve never had before. I’m not saying I don’t get mad, or pass slow drivers aggressively in my truck hauling ass, flow master just a screaming because they won’t go the hell on! Or lose patience with people, and etc. But the difference is, is that after the fact I’m over it….just like that. Back to calmness, and on with my day.

It’s bitter sweet in a way because it’s sweet I can calm down so fast, but bitter because I really want to slap some bitch across the face for being a bitch but noooooo….I’m all cool and collected so I smile in their face instead hahahaha…geez.

I do want to say that yes I have pulled down several of my posts and put them in a private folder. It’s not against or has anything to do with anyone liking or commenting. After I read some of the posts I wrote I was disgusted with myself, that’s not me. Some of them will never be back for public view because they were very personal and for my eyes only, some will after I straighten them up. I don’t think any of them were anybody’s favorite, so they probably won’t be missed anyhow.

Any who, I hope y’all are doing great! I know life sucks most days but hey it is our lives, we gotta make the most of it somehow. Winking at ya hehe.

I kind of get upset because I can’t get upset and stay upset, make sense??? I do admit I like it, it saves lives bahaha! But I do still have days where I have to retreat, be by myself. I’m not angry but I feel like I need to find a balance before being around people for a bit.

Omg y’all, I haven’t walked or exercised in like a month. I have a lil belly that has gotten a tad pudgeier….I don’t think that’s a word but I’m gonna use it lol. I don’t have the energy anymore, sleep then work then sleep then work, all I do now. I need a man to do the working for awhile…y’all know that was a lie right? Haha. I wouldn’t turn down winning lottery tickets though, then I’ll buy a private island and hide! I’ll have a man shipped in every now and then for…you know…to treat myself then ship his ass back, lol. I’m joking, chill out.

See what I mean? I’m in a goofy mood but I had a rough day today. Everybody thinks I’m made of money and I have none! I’m trying to pay everyone of my bills, especially to those that have helped me out when they didn’t have to, but some weeks are tight as hell ugggghhh. Which I’m sick of to no end.

Oh, I’m up to something too, its a secret, if it works I will fill you in on it. I tell no one my plans anymore other than about my dream to write and travel til I’m too old to do so. So many people want to influence you with their negativity that it can cause you to fail, so I don’t tell. I rhymed right there, you hear that? Lol I gotta go to bed!

A different mindset causes you to view people and situations way different. You question yourself like, ‘what was I thinking or doing’?

Well I’m signing off, I’m sleepy.

Hope y’all have a good night and a great day tomorrow!

Love, Lori

P.S. Be a true friend to someone..

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