September 11, 2017

I love my days off!

Well hello everyone. I hope everybody is staying safe with the crazy weather that’s going on. I live in north Georgia and there is a warning because of Irma, I don’t think it’s going to do anything here much, but I have family in Florida that’s having to deal with it. I hope everyone everywhere is going to be alright.
I’m of course sitting here enjoying my coffee. I got a late start on my morning coffee time lol. I love being lazy on my days off so much, it’s addicting! I just wish I could work online already, tired of making others rich ya know. I’ll get there. One day soon. But it sure as hell could hurry up though lol.
I updated my blog websites for both of my blogs this morning, Porch Tales 101 is my other one, it’s for anything basically as well except it will not have profanity, sexual talk, etc. I wanted a blog that is friendly for all eyes but I do love this one because I can post anything basically and just be myself.
I haven’t been playing on the social media much lately because I just got sick of it. All I see is people bitching and tons of whoring shit going on with almost everybody, two-faced people, lying bitches, etc. I know some of the fake ass people too, cracks me up how people build their self up for others to view them for something they’re not. 300 women I’m not friends with, we all have the same men in common we’re all friends with but not with each other. Men liking all the pretty girl pics up like hell. They do mine too with messages to follow so I guess it’s a pretty good assumption they get the same “You are beautiful”, “You are badass” messages too. It’s kinda funny lol. I think I’m going to start deleting the majority of these men though. It’s actually peaceful when I’m not all caught up in the bullshit.
All that chaos and all the chaos I deal with on a daily basis was too much. I backed off and quietened down because for one, I don’t feel like I fit in anyone’s world nor do I feel like I’m really wanted. I don’t hardly even talk anymore except to my sons. But since I have stopped talking, stopped starting all conversations….my phone remains quite. That tells me a lot, everything I need to know. Silence is definitely an answer. My gut feeling was right on several people not just men. It lets you know where you stand in people’s lives and apparently I don’t stand out or in at all. But you know what…..I don’t care anymore, I’m not begging for nothing-I shouldn’t have to. I have my sons and a daughter n law and a grand baby on the way, not to mention I have freedom, I’m learning to be happy with just us. No one is a better feeling than feeling not wanted by those around you.
I did turn off the sharing to facebook button though so my blog posts wouldn’t be shared to my facebook. I was getting comments and attitudes from some that have no idea what they’re talking about. For example: Some of the stories I write I would get comments like.. “Hey baby, I can do that for you”, or messages saying, “Let daddy stroke that kitten sexy and I’ll show you what you’re missing”. Hahahahaha!!! Oh please! The stories are fictional and they think I’m calling out for a sexual need lol. Even with me stating it’s just a story, they don’t stop. Sickening is what it is, social media like facebook or instagram just about disgusts me so bad I don’t even want to interact anymore. But of course I have to be an asshole back to them haha, I tell them “I don’t need help, I’m getting my big ‘good jewels right now’, Oh he’s soooo big!” Pisses them off lol. I get, “Oh I see”, and, “Lucky man”, and, “Alrighty then”. They shut up for the most part after that until a new one pops up in my inbox. BUT let me state this, I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself, causing my own self to need a nap afterwards!
AHHH felt good to gripe for a minute haha! I’m done now lol.
Yes I’m doing just fine keeping to myself. It is a little lonelier but I’ve been through worse shit than this. My finances are definitely keeping me down, I find it hard to look over it or act like it isn’t a problem when getting evicted is a huge problem. Yea I still haven’t been able to get caught up yet. It sucks ass. I have searched and filled out applications like crazy. Went through my stuff looking for things to sell. Trying to figure out how to get a dreaded loan or something. Shit just goes like that for me. You’d think I’d just get used to it really lol.
Oh and last night I ran to pee because I almost didn’t make it to the toilet AND I was met by this HUGE spider!! That bitch ran faster than I did…..I jumped, I screamed, I had pee trickling down my leg!!!!!! I killed it though, damn spiders. It was almost as big as the palm of my hand, may have been with its legs flattened out, UGH!
And by the way I’m not feeling sorry for myself nor am I sitting here crying over anything, especially not crying anymore over people that don’t really want me. Nor am I angry. I have been pep talking myself basically. Repeating certain statements to myself to remind myself they ain’t worth it. And the same thing with situations and bills. It helps me so I’m sticking with it.
Just like with anything I write, I hope someone got something out of it. A sentence, a word, something. Love you people.
Love, Lori

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