May 13, 2017

Good Morning 🤗

Hey everybody! First of all I want to thank everyone for visiting and reading my blog. I do notice and I’m very grateful. Brings a smile to my face to know that somebody is listening somewhere. I know I get cranky and all bent out of shape sometimes but life is hard and it’s hard on me as well as you guys. 
With everything I got going against me I still manage to get up and keep pushing myself everyday. If I could ever get my finances under control and get rid of my heartache I would be a hell of a lot better off. Those are my main problems that eat at me everyday. 
Mother’s Day is hard on me, hell any holiday is because my mom isn’t here. There’s not a day that goes by I don’t think of her and wish I could pick up the phone to hear her voice. She was my everything, my best friend, my momma. I miss her so damn bad! 
Well yesterday I got a message out of the blue and I was took out to dinner for a Mother’s Day gift and I got a new fan! Loved it. 
I actually have something to do today….I’m going to this beautiful little girls birthday party! She’s my best friends little girl. I love them so much and their family. I swear though if I didn’t have her in my life I’d probably have done been admitted to a crazy house haha. 😂
You know I gave up trying..trying with wanting to be wanted. Or really just if I feel I ain’t wanted I back off and won’t talk hardly. It sucks but I’m not a pushy person on that shit. If you want me you want me, if not I’ll remove myself. I won’t be made out to be a fool for nobody. I’ve been made to feel stupid for giving a fuck and I hate it so now I won’t hardly speak to nobody or like or comment on social media anymore or message/call….unless it’s my buddies. 
Here’s something I’ve never told anyone at all. Every single day when I wake up I sit up and say out loud ‘today could be the day when I run into the man meant for me’. So I push myself to put myself together to be ready for him. And try to take care of myself everyday for whenever that day comes. Sounds kinda silly but it’s all I have. I’m very independent but even I need someone too. I’m human and a female, I have needs too. 
I want to write another story so bad but I can’t concentrate long enough lol. Bare with me I will eventually. I can’t possibly keep all these thoughts and ideas in my head for long lol. 
I hope everyone has a wonderful day today! 
Love, Lori💜

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